Assumptions

I wrote about inviting our immediate neighbors for a potluck gathering here at Possum Central. It seemed like the perfect way for the neighbors to get together and shmooze. JM agreed with me and we started inviting.

What I didn't realize was that although this type of gathering is the most natural thing in the world for Americans, and is seen as a casual way of folks getting together without anyone having too much hassle, it is NOT a natural thing for the French.

Mr. Possum admits that he did not have his "French head" on when he agreed to this, or he might have explained the problems to me. The French do not invite outsiders into their homes as easily as Americans. "Casual" entertaining is a concept which they, especially older people, do not truly understand. Indeed, instead of creating a realaxed, informal gathering, I may actually be stressing them all out!

I feel quite bad about this, because it was not at all my intention. I've had two couples back out, both with excellent reasons, but JM is not convinced that at least one of them wasn't just so concerned about what they would bring that they just decided not to come at all! I do hope that is not the case and he is overreacting.

I had to tell our baker and his wife that really, if they only want to come for 20 minutes just to have a drink and say hello that it is perfectly okay! There isn't really any obligation to bring something beyond themselves. I know this is their busy season, and sleep is at a premium.

Hopefully, all will turn out okay and those of us who do appear will have a good time. But it is an object lesson in never assuming that because something is acceptable in one culture, that the same is true of another!

I guess we'll find out tomorrow!

Ciao for now.

Randy

Celebrating Life

What with the loss of Pepete this week, and the realization that we're once again entering the holiday season, I came up with a cunning plan.

Why are do we only appreciate our friends when something goes wrong? When we realize they are ill or we get together over a tragedy? There are so many people in our lives whom we like but don't really make time to see, that is a mistake we often live to regret.

I decided, therefore, to introduce a good old-fashioned American custom to our little Possum Kingdom; we're having a holiday pot-luck with the neighbors. At first, I was hesitant, because if you invite this one, do you invite that one? Will the people you don't invite be offended? But, I realized that those thoughts would only lead to total inaction. I felt that if the the "theme" was to get together with the neighbors, then it should only be close neighbors for this particular gathering.

Therefore, others of our friends just have to be left out. We will, I hope, all find another occasion to gather that group together.

I wasn't sure when I started this that it would be an idea that would appeal to people, because except for events like the party we had for the authors in the short story collection, most folks aren't really used to the pot-luck concept. Sure, if you go to someone's house you bring something, but mostly the inviter has a menu all planned out. I like the idea of the pot-luck, because one person isn't left with all the work and expense and can therefore invite more people.

The idea seems to have gone over well with the neighbors, luckily. First, I think that they like the thought of being able to relax and have a longer conversation than what we tend to do in the street. And, with the cold weather setting in, people just don't see each other the way we do in the summer when we're all sitting around outside so much more.

And, we do have a number of widowed men and women on our street who spend a lot of time alone in their homes. I was truly pleased to see that being invited to something like this really seemed to make them happy.

We won't be a huge crowd, but a manageable 20 or so; just enough to mingle nicely and have plenty of good conversation.

I really encourage my readers to see if something like this won't work with your neighbors; maybe we can start a movement.

Ciao for now.

Randy