The Battle is Over
My stepfather, Bob, passed away yesterday afternoon after his brief but valiant battle with liver cancer.
Despite the anxious moments caused by shipping him out of the hospital to the hospice, in the end that turned out to have been a far easier experience for my mother. Strangely, after the major hoo-ha of demanding a $6000 cash deposit, they wound up taking no money in advance; probably because they realized that he was only going to be there for a very short time.
I'm very proud of my mother, who is dealing with this better than I would do in similar circumstances. She's also really looking forward to seeing us in September and moving here once we get things straightened out with visas, living accommodation, selling her house, etc. I think knowing that she's going to have "an adventure" is very helpful in this new chapter of her life.
I wish that I could have been there for Mom during all of this, but distance made that impossible. I do have to say that it is the only time since we moved that I felt handicapped being so far away. It is certainly something that needs to be thought about when moving from one country to another. We moved secure in the knowledge that Mom had Bob there to look after her. After all, he was about 13 years younger than she, so it seemed logical to imagine that she would pass away first. Clearly, the Universe had other plans.
This will be a good opportunity for us to rediscover each other, and for her to experience life in another country; something she has never done before.
Over the next few months, I expect to write more about the challenges of bringing an elderly parent to a distant land. I imagine we're all going to learn a lot in the process.
Ciao for now.
Randy
Despite the anxious moments caused by shipping him out of the hospital to the hospice, in the end that turned out to have been a far easier experience for my mother. Strangely, after the major hoo-ha of demanding a $6000 cash deposit, they wound up taking no money in advance; probably because they realized that he was only going to be there for a very short time.
I'm very proud of my mother, who is dealing with this better than I would do in similar circumstances. She's also really looking forward to seeing us in September and moving here once we get things straightened out with visas, living accommodation, selling her house, etc. I think knowing that she's going to have "an adventure" is very helpful in this new chapter of her life.
I wish that I could have been there for Mom during all of this, but distance made that impossible. I do have to say that it is the only time since we moved that I felt handicapped being so far away. It is certainly something that needs to be thought about when moving from one country to another. We moved secure in the knowledge that Mom had Bob there to look after her. After all, he was about 13 years younger than she, so it seemed logical to imagine that she would pass away first. Clearly, the Universe had other plans.
This will be a good opportunity for us to rediscover each other, and for her to experience life in another country; something she has never done before.
Over the next few months, I expect to write more about the challenges of bringing an elderly parent to a distant land. I imagine we're all going to learn a lot in the process.
Ciao for now.
Randy
4 Comments:
Much sympathy, and many hugs to you and the denizens of Possumworld. A lot of us are dealing with aging parents, and one of the unexpected blessings is that the internet so greatly expands our communications.
What a grand adventure for your mother. I bet she'll flower and expand happily in a new place. And the challenges of all the newness is probably the best thing for her heart and mind just now.
By Mnemosyne, At 2:33 AM
I'm so sorry, Randy. Are you an only child? Seems that I remember that. I believe she'll thrive being in a wholly new environment.
Hugs,
Pat
By Anonymous, At 6:31 PM
I'm so sorry to hear about Bob, Randy. I've been watching the sad process through the blog. As said by others, it will be good for her to get there and have a new phase of her life and with you there.
Cheryl
By CMC, At 1:05 AM
Hi its been fun reading your blog. My mum was actually born and raised in Chalabre but we Live in England now. My grandparents Roger and Renee Vidal lived above the garage as my grandad was the local mechanic. Its nice to read about the place as I dont get to go back as often as I would like although my mum does go back every summer. I will be buying the book as a surprise for her. I hope you enjoy living there, Im so jealous!!! Celine.
By Anonymous, At 9:24 PM
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